I was young. I was foolish. I was in love. To most it was a day like any other and most likely they were grumbling about the upcoming snow storm. For me, I was with the girl I loved and it was what was to be the first day of the rest of my life.
In reality, it had been a pretty rough day. For several months I had been living in a upscale condo in East Grand Rapids that the girl I was engaged to (or whatever the hip term is for a girl you are going to marry is) parents had been paying for. Of course, they did not know I was living there. Despite my future bride's excitement of such a glorious day when we could live together and experience all the happiness life could offer, she knew down deep that her parents would not and could not sanction her marrying so young. She knew they would be the dark storm clouds that rolled in as the hard rain was about to pour. She knew there lectures would be the grand thunder and lightening during a horrible storm.
But she knew she had to tell them and she did. Their reaction was predictable. The asked her to do the one thing no parent ever should... to choose between two loves. In her mind at that moment there was no choice. She was deeply, madly and passionately in love with me and that was all there was to it. So to no one's surprise we were kicked to the curb and her parents were just short of disowning her.
Young, foolish and in love. we loaded everything we could fit into the station wagon that we had and we headed off to our new life. For me I was going home. I knew I had no other real options other that to come back, but I also somehow knew it was a fatal error. It must be somewhat like walking into an ambush where you know going forward is certain death but you've come too far to turn back.
But, on this day, that thought was a small tiny blinking light that I ignored. I was in love and be damned to anything that stood in my way. I was going to defy all odds and over come any and all obstacles. She drove and for awhile we talked. Then I drifted off to some good music on the radio.
Suddenly I was jolted from my peaceful sleep. We were spinning and traffic was heavy. And for a second, and a second only....I thought it was the end. And I was okay with that. I would die with the one I loved. Then I thought I can't let the one I love die. Not that I had any control over it. We had hit a spot of black ice (for those in none snow places.... it's like Ice that you can't see and VERY slippery). We spun and just like a NASCAR crash people whizzed by us on both sides while we were powerless to do anything but spin.
Fortunately (well more so than death), we landed in a ditch. POP! Oh damn a tire went flat. Well, okay we have a spare. POP! A second tire went flat. @#@*! POP! The third tire went flat and you guessed it ....POP! The fourth tire went flat. It was below zero out and we were sitting in a car on a highway far away from the nearest town with four damn flat tires. We were just starting out together so we had little money. Maybe we would have had enough money for one tire, but FOUR? Really? REALLY?
Looking back on the memory , maybe it was a sign of things to come. But despite just about all the crud that could be thrown at us being piled up on us, we still smiled because we were in love. We didn't have a clue what to do. This was before everyone had cellphones and all the traffic that had been coming had thinned out. We didn't want to leave one person alone and we both couldn't try to make it back to the nearest town because we had all our possessions and the cat in the car.
And even if we did find help, and even if we did get towed, what the blue blazes would we do? We didn't have enough money for four new tires? Who the heck thinks four tires are going to blow?
So after a cop happened to drive by and call a tow truck and after we had been towed back, I did the only thing I could. Only love could have made me do this. I picked up the phone and called my parents. I swallowed that pride and it was a hard pill to swallow.
At just under 20, I was young and rebellious. I knew everything and I let nothing stand in my way, so naturally the relationship with my parents had been strained and when I went to East Grand Rapids I hardly spoke to them and our relationship was all but non-existent. Even to this day I think my parents harbor a grudge about this and things have never quite been the same.
So to pick up that phone and have to call and then ask for money to people I spoke to maybe twice in 6 months was tough and painful. But I had no choice. Her parents sure in the hell weren't going to give us a damn thing, much less money. I did it and to my surprise my parents said no. At the time this shocked the living hell out of me. I mean our relationship was strained, but in the end wasn't I still there son? Didn't they still love me? Didn't the know I was stranded with no way out?
I pleaded and only after agreeing to pay back every cent with money down when I saw them (keep in mind we are just starting out, poor and now jobless)they said they would help. Having no choice I agreed. And the next day we were back on the road headed home. All I could think of was the love I was in and I didn't care about yesterday, the debt I was now in or the hardship that our parents would slam on us. No, I was in love and even though it was snowing, it was a beautiful sun shinning day in my world.
And that was a love blissed snowy day that was the beginning of the end....
Written about a snowy day in 1997.
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